10 Things to Know About Parent-Child Relationships

Parent-child relationships develop over time, influenced by child characteristics, parent characteristics, and the contexts in which families ... Skiptomaincontent NeilFarberM.D,Ph.D.,CLC,CPT TheBlameGame 10ThingstoKnowAboutParent-ChildRelationships Theparent-childrelationshipisdifferentfromallothers. PostedApril10,2016 | ReviewedbyJessicaSchrader Share Tweet Email "...themotherandchildreunion,isonlyamotionaway.”—PaulSimon Source:GraphicStock,usedwithpermission PaulSimonwasrightaboutthemotherandchildreunionbeingaveryclosebond.Theparent-childrelationshipisqualitativelydifferentthanallofourotherrelationships.Dr.KeithCrnic,professorandchairmanofthepsychologydepartmentatArizonaStateUniversity,hasextensivelystudiedthisrelationshipformostofhiscareer.Hislabhaslookedathowthenatureofstressinparent-childrelationshipsinfluenceschildandfamilyfunction.Hehasalsousedlongitudinalstudiestolookattheassociationbetweenparentingstylesandchildren’semotionsandbehaviorsthatmaycontributetoearlymentalhealthissuesinchildren. Parent-childrelationshipsdevelopovertime,influencedbychildcharacteristics,parentcharacteristics,andthecontextsinwhichfamiliesoperate.Thesefactorsmixtogetherinuniquewaystocreateincrediblediversityinthequalitiesofthoserelationships. Source:GraphicStock,usedwithpermission Weknowthatourroleasparentsisacriticalone,intermsofchilddevelopment.Butwhatexactlycanweandshouldwebedoingtoraisementallyhealthychildrenorattheveryleast,tominimizetheimpactofmentaldisorders?Obviously,theansweriscomplex.HereareafewtipsfromDr.Crnic’sresearch. 1)Therearegreatbenefitsofeffectiveparentingtochilddevelopmentundernormalcircumstances,andevengreaterbenefitsinthefaceofrisk.Therearecertainriskfactorsthatareuniquetoparent-childrelationships.Therelationshipprocessesinvolvedmaydependonwheretheriskresides…inthechild(e.g.developmentaldisability,prematurity,behaviorproblems),theparent(e.g.psychopathology),orthefamilycontext(e.g.economichardship,minoritystatus).Childdevelopmentaldelay,childdiagnosisofADHD/ODD,andlowfamilyincomeareassociatedwithlowerpositiveparentingscores,ameasureofa“resilientparent.”Maternaleducationactsasaprotectivebuffertoimproveresilientparentingforyoungerchildren(aged3-5)whilematernalhealthisprotectivefor5-year-olds.Oneofthegreatestprotectivefactorsismaternaloptimism,whichiseffectiveforchildrenages3to8. 2)Childrenwithdevelopmentaldelaysaremorelikelytohavebehavioralissues.Theextentofachild’sbehaviorproblemsisastrongcontributortoparentingstress,moresothanthechild’scognitivedelay. 3)Parentalwarmthandcontrol,inapositiveway,arethetwomostimportantparentalattributesthathelptocreatepositiveeffects.Inresearchterms,thisisparentalaffectandsensitivity.Positiveemotionalreactivityandself-regulationareimportantparentalfactorsindevelopinghealthychildren’stemperament. 4)Mothersandfatherssharesomechildrearingattributesandeffects,butalsodifferinimportantwaysthatcreateuniquerelationshipqualities.Bothmothersandfathersofchildrenwithborderlineintellectualfunctioninghavemorenegativecontrollingparenting(childage5-6)thandidparentsoftypicallydevelopingchildren.Inturn,thosechildrenwithborderlineintellectualfunctioningshowedmoredifficultbehavior.Itisinterestingthatnegativepaternalbehaviorispredictedbyearlierchildbehaviorwhilenegativematernalbehaviorpredictschilddifficulties. Source:GraphicStock,usedwithpermission 5)Emotion,inallitsfacets,playsanimportantroleinthedevelopmentandtrajectoryofparent-childrelationships.It’satwo-waystreet;children’semotionsaffectingparentalbehaviorsandparentalemotionsaffectingchildren’sdevelopmentandbehaviors.Theregulationofemotionisespeciallycriticalinparent-childrelationships,forparentsasmodels,andforchildrenasacoredevelopmentalcompetence. 6)Attunementisanimportantfactorinparent-childrelationships.Thisinvolvesthedynamicandcomplexpatternsofsensitivemutualunderstandingsandinteractionsbetweenchildrenandtheirparents.Attunementischaracterizedbycorrespondencesinbiological,affective,cognitive,andbehavioraldomains.AsDr.Bornsteinnotes,“wheninteractionswithcaregiversfalloutofattunementbybecomingmistimedormismatched,childrenandparentsbothexperiencedistress." 7)Oneparent’shostilitymightdisrupttheotherparent’sabilitytomaintainapositiverelationshipwithhisorherchildren.Thefather-childrelationshipappearstobeespeciallyvulnerabletoparentalhostility. 8)Stressisubiquitousandreflectedinmanydifferentcontextsthatcanaffectthequalityofparent-childrelationships.Inparticular,stress-effectsassociatedwithparenting(challengingchildbehaviorandparentingtasks)maybegreaterthantheeffectsofgenerallifestressonfamilies. 9)Maternalsocialfactorsandinfanttemperamentcansignificantlyinfluencethedevelopmentofinfantneurobiology.Maternalsocialfactorsmayeitherpromoteorstrainparent-infantadaptationovertime.Prenatalpsychosocialstressorssignificantlyaffectinfanthealthanddevelopment.Prenatalmaternaldepressionandlackofsocialsupportpredictedhighercortisolamonginfantswithmoretemperamentalnegativity.Inaddition,motherswithnegativelytemperamentalinfantsweremorelikelytoshowmaternaldistressandlesssocialsupportfromprenatalto12weekspostpartum. 10)Father-sonrelationshipisthemostsusceptibletocrossovereffectsofparentalhostility(affectedbyhostilityfromtheotherparent),whilethefather-daughterrelationshipseemstobemoreprotectedintheearlyyears. HereareWhitneyHouston’sfivetipsforparenting,whichis"TheGreatestLoveofAll." 1)Ibelievethechildrenareourfuture. 2)Teachthemwellandletthemleadtheway. 3)Showthemallthebeautytheypossessinside. 4)Givethemasenseofpridetomakeiteasier. 5)Letthechildren'slaughterremindushowweusedtobe. Source:GraphicStock,usedwithpermission Dr.Crnic’sextensiveworkhasformedthefoundationforthislineofparent-childresearch.HewillbesteppingdownasChairmanofthePsychologyDepartmentatArizonaStateUniversityattheendofthisyearandmostlikelyretiringshortlythereafter.Whenaskedhowhewillfeelnotbeinginvolvedinpsychologyresearch,Dr.Crnictoldmethateveninretirement,hewillcontinuetoplayaroleandbeinvolvedinresearchactivitiesasaprofessoremeritus. Whyhashespenthiscareerstudyingtheparent-childrelationship?“Attemptingtounderstandthenatureandcourseofparent-childrelationshipsisendlesslyfascinatingandendlesslychallenging.Thisisallthemoretruewhensituationsconspiretocreateunforeseenriskswithinfamiliesthatdemandwholenewapproachestoparentingprocesses.Inourwork,it’sallaboutunderstandingthemechanismofeffectortheprocessesthroughwhichrelationshipsdevelop.” Formoreinformation,contacttheDepartmentofPsychologyatArizonaStateUniversity. [email protected],orlikemyFacebookpage,"TheKeytoAchieve."Visitmywebsitehere. References Ellingsen,etal.J.Intellectualdevelopmentresearch,July,2013.Ellingsen,etal.Researchindevelopmentaldisabilities,April,2014. Baker,etal.AmJMentalRetardation.Dec,2002. Bates,etalHandbookofTemperament,GuilfordPress,2012. Stevenson&Crnic,2015;Crnicetal.,2009. Fenning,etal.JournalofFamilyPsychology,April,2014. Coburn,Crnic&RossInfantandChildDevelopment,24,2015. JournalofChildandFamilyStudies.July,2014. More references Share Tweet Email advertisement AbouttheAuthor NeilFarber,M.D.,Ph.D., isanadjunctProfessorofPsychologyatArizonaStateUniversity.Heisaretiredphysician,lifecoach,hypnotherapist,researcherandtheauthorofThrowAwayYourVisionBoard. Online:TheKeytoAchieve,Facebook,LinkedIn,Twitter ReadNext DiggingYourWayOutofaResentmentRut ToVieworNottoView?ThatIstheQuestion advertisement MostPopular HowtoDealWithaNarcissist’sSenseofEntitlement HowandWhyEMDRWorks 10CharacteristicsofMentallyHealthyPeople 7SignsofAntisocialPersonalityDisorder 9EasyWaystoStartaConversationwithaStranger WhyYouNeedtoUnderstandtheLatestPersonalityTrait:Anankastia advertisement FindaTherapist Getthehelpyouneedfromatherapistnearyou–aFREEservicefromPsychologyToday. 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